" If I have to conduct with my problems all alone , I might as well be . I was still very much in love with him , but dearest is n’t enough . "
There’s a tonnnn of societal focus on the relationships that either result in marriage, or end up crashing and burning. IMHO, not enough people talk about the in-betweeners: the relationships that end rather peacefully. But those are often the most interesting!
Well lucky for us, Redditors have been sharing their brutally honest answers to this question: “People who have left aperfectly ‘fine’ relationshipto seek something ‘more,’ how did it go?” And TBH, the responses are way more fascinating than any cheating scandal you could tell me about.
So here are some of the top stories people shared:
1.“I left a ‘perfectly fine’ marriage when I was 30. We had been together since I was 17; he was 10 years older than me. Everything looked great from the outside, and even from the inside it was fine. But over time, my sense of myself began to diminish more and more. When I left, I had several years of being really lost, and I questioned my decision daily. Over time, I found my footing and grew into the person I am now (at 62). I remarried when I was 45. My marriage isn’t ‘perfectly fine’ — it is fantastic.”
" I never ever fantasize about get out , like I did with my first married couple . I am so happy I leave the first marriage . It was the best decision of my life . "
— Commercial - Visit9356
2.“Many years ago, I was dating a really sweet young lady, and loved her dearly. I was swayed by a much more sexually adventurous woman, and broke up with my girlfriend. I never cheated on her, but I did end the relationship. The adventurous one ended up cheating on me twice before we broke up.”
" Granted , it ended fine because years later I would get together my eventual wife ( married 30 years ) , but it was a stupid mistake at the time . "
— MysteriousDudeness
3.“I nearly left, if that counts. At the 32-year mark, I was tasked for eighteen months with the end-of-life care for my parents, and it nearly destroyed me. My husband did not do one thing to support me, even when directly asked. In the years I processed my own trauma, I began to see him in a much more honest light. I had placed him on a pedestal all of our years together. I came very close to leaving — however, our mature family, four grandkids, affluent lifestyle, and mostly daily compatibility made me pause.”
" Now , I am OK , strong , and very clear that in many respects I am on my own in this life . I reckon I settled , but at 67 , it is what it is 🤷 ♀ ️. "
— lazygramma
4.“A friend divorced her husband years ago because she was bored. She never married again nor had a romantic relationship — not for lack of desire; dates turned into friendships or fizzled out. She told me about five years after she’d divorced him (and he was happily remarried) not to leave someone because they are boring.”
" There ’s no warranty that you ’ll feel someone more exciting . "
— kitchengardengal
5.“I was married, but it was just ‘fine.’ Very little sex, very little laughter — just roommates who shared chores. We had never really been head-over-heels in love, but had a very stable, solid relationship, for the most part. The separation was initially mutual, but then my ex changed his mind at the 11th hour and didn’t want the divorce. At that point, I was too far gone mentally. There was nothing left for me. So we divorced. There was no one else, just a deep dissatisfaction with my relationship.”
" It look at 8 years to discover my current cooperator , and I could n’t be happier . This is what I knew I wanted and merit all along ( everyone deserves this sort of honey and connexion ) . "
— Indoorsy_outdoorsy
6.“I dated a beautiful girl for about six months. I went on a trip and stayed in a friend’s apartment, where a girl who I had a crush on years before was living. She had shot me down when I asked her on a date. I realized I felt more deeply about the ex-crush than I did about my girlfriend. I decided I wanted something deeper, so I broke up with her that night.”
" Married the crushed leather two years by and by . It ’s now been 44 years . "
— ever - inquisitive
7.“I just realized I preferred not to have a partner. We were ‘fine,’ but being coupled added more stress than it alleviated, for me. So I wasn’t hoping for someone better. Alone was better.”
— Esmer_Tina
8.“His lifestyle was mainly staying home and watching TV, and he was fine with that being all that he did. I ended up having to go events I found interesting by myself. The one time I was able to get him to go to a poetry open mic with me, he complained about being bored and we had to leave early. I ended up leaving him, mainly because if I have to go to so many things alone and deal with my problems alone, I might as well be. I basically already was. I was still very much in love with him, but love isn’t enough. You can still find yourself in a dynamic where you’re doing all the work with someone who just isn’t meeting your effort.”
" I ’ve been single since , which take a leak it seven year now , but it ’s been seven years of serenity . I have been able to go wherever I want and do whatever I want . I ’m not chained to the couch watching TV with someone because that ’s all they require to do .
I was also getting tired of of him plain about how he hated living with his parent and did n’t care his business . Today , he ’s still live with his parent , and only just exchange jobs . That ’s seven years of quetch I am so glad I did n’t have to listen to . "
— Painting_Necessary
9.“I moved to my current city 10 years ago, and my kids made friends with other kids who had single moms. Every single one of them is still single 10 years later, and they each wanted a happier ending. There’s a lack of good single men in this area, and wives tend to hold onto the good ones. So, leaving is no guarantee ‘better’ will be out there.”
— Mountain_Alfalfa_245
10.“I, a 39-year-old female, left a perfectly fine relationship when I was 24. But looking back, it wasn’t actually ‘perfectly fine.’ We dated six years, and we didn’t live together. I didn’t meet his family. We were wildly different at the time. We did not have great sex. He is a great person, but he wasn’t my person.”
" How is it going ? I have dated great people since then , but nobody has stuck around for the long haulage . I ’ve get wind and grow a lot .
I ’m pretty happy with my decision , all things considered . I believe I was deeply unhappy and if I had uphold that relationship , I would belike have cheated and done tough things to end it . "
— West_Jellyfish_8443
11.“I got divorced in 2023. Many aspects of the relationship were good; however, I never felt enough sexual compatibility — and other differences were starting to emerge. If I don’t get into another relationship, it doesn’t bother me that much.”
" I ’m in therapy now ( not connected with the relationship ) and calculate for personal growth . "
— Intelligent_Put_3606
12.“I left the relationship that was ‘perfectly fine’ when I was 30 years old. There was nothing horrible going on, but I knew I wasn’t happy, that we weren’t much of a couple, and that I had settled. I met him when I was very young, and we got married pretty much because it was the next step, not because we were head over heels in love with each other.”
" 17 old age later … I am remarried and have been for 13 age . The sentiment of staying with my ex - husband still clear me shudder . "
— caryn1477
13.“I left a perfectly fine marriage. I was 19 when we met, and we were together five years. I realized almost immediately that, though there was nothing ‘wrong,’ the whole thing wasn’t ‘right’ either. At least for me.”
" I left him about twelve hour after encounter someone I had an instant , lightning - bolt association with . We move in together straight off and were together 42 years , with two kids . "
— Iaminavacuum
14.“Working as a bodyman, I was burned third-degree over 32% of my body, and it took five surgeries to recover. The fire caused a change in my careers, which required me to move. That caused the split between me and my wife, who was a teacher. She didn’t want to give up tenure and start all over again, and I had to take the job, because jobs like it were once-in-a-lifetime offers. So we agreed to split. She moved on, and so did I.”
" 28 years after , I ’m still work out , and she ’s retired and enjoy life . I remarried and have another really honest cleaning woman who loves the travel .
We ’ve settle down in the mountains . Life ’s not perfect , but it ’s work . "
— Comfortable_Day_9252
15.“I dumped four steady boyfriends of 18 months or more over the years for various reasons. It never occurred to me that I needed to stay in a relationship that was OKAY just to avoid being single.”
— CookbooksRUs
16.“If you’re thinking about leaving, everything isn’t ‘fine.’ And it’s okay to seek fulfillment! Listen to that Jiminy Cricket — your mind is telling you something.”
" I left , and I ’m much happy alone . You are allow to be individual and happy with that ! I have fulfilling relationship and my own space , all my needs are being met . "
— ImpossiblySoggy
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Note : Some responses have been delete for length and/or clarity .
