" We were together for five years and wed for six calendar month . Now , we ’ve blocked each other and have n’t spoken since we signed the divorce papers . "
word of advice : This post hold back quotation of revilement .
We recentlyaskedpeople of theBuzzFeed Communitywho got divorced in their first year of marriage to reveal their stories, and they revealed the heartbreaking and shocking things that led to the ending of their marriage. Here’s what they had to say:
1.“Read his diary, and he wrote that he married me because I owned a house, made a good living, and he needed someone to take care of his 4-year-old son. It was immediately over. I still hate him.”
— Anonymous , 34 , California
2.“He started having an affair 11 months after our marriage. Once I called said marriage, I then found out from numerous others that he had slept with someone days after our wedding but refused to consummate our marriage for eight weeks, because ‘it didn’t work for me.'”
— lazychef70
3.“Two months married, and he hit me. Or tried to. We were sitting side by side on the bench seat of his truck. He tried to punch my face but couldn’t do it well because he was driving with his left hand and tried to punch me with his right; I was sitting on his right, and he couldn’t get the correct angle because his elbow bumped the back of the bench seat, and I was sitting too close to him to be punched ‘correctly.’ But I obviously knew what he’d intended to do.”
" Then , he was shocked I divorced him . perfectly appalled . He thought he owned me because he waited until he married me to hit me . The singular part was that I was a process server . I pitch legal papers ( like divorce newspaper publisher , tiddler support , and other non - criminal papers ) for a living . He was shocked both that I ’d disassociate him at all and that I roll in the hay how . Like , dude , did you forget what I do for a life ? I have it away where the courthouse is . "
— problem_child _
4.“There were signs that I ignored. We were together for about four years, and our relationship was toxic. Well, she was toxic. I kept telling myself things will get betterif —If we move in together, if we move to a new place, if we find new friends, if I propose, and we get married. During a fight, I threw the ring across the room. Several months later, our son was born, and I realized he shouldn’t grow up in a household where his folks were at each other’s throats. So, I left.”
" The divorce took forever becauseshe lied about everything . yr later , my son is awful , and she has disaffect her whole family . I ’m happily remarried and loving my spouse . "
— Anonymous , 55 , South Carolina
5.“His personal coach pushed him to make the decision to propose or move on after we had been living together for 10 years. When he proposed, I thought, ‘I can’t do this?’ But I said, ‘Yes,’ anyway. We had a fairytale wedding (from the outside looking in), but when we got back to ‘real life,’ things got worse. He became even more verbally abusive than he had been before, and I was wildly depressed.”
" He journey for work , and six month after we had been married , he got confused with me while he was on the road . He then ignore my vociferation for three mean solar day , and when we finally spoke again , he need if I wanted a divorce . We went to dinner party , and he said he had made a Brobdingnagian fault and was n’t really in beloved , and we were disunite a workweek later on . We have n’t spoken since . "
— furryorc747
6.“I got married young (22) and after dating for less than two years. He was older, though (26), so I thought that made it okay. Nope. All we focused on was our wedding. We never talked about the rest of our lives and what our family would look like, whether we would travel, how many kids we would have, etc. There was nothing overtly wrong; it was just boring and not what I wanted. I moved out after 11 months and realized I didn’t want to do this for the rest of my life. We wanted different things for our future, and I was willing to admit that ‘just okay’ wasn’t going to cut it for me.”
" I spend the next few years really figuring out who I was and what I require my lifespan to look like . I encounter my friction match , and after dating for four days , I got married again . This prison term , we knew exactly what the rest of our lives would look like before we ever talked about a marriage . We just keep our ninth wedding day of remembrance and have the most unbelievable 5 - twelvemonth - old . I have n’t see my ex since he move out of our shared apartment 16 years ago , but he also remarried eventually and looks happy in the few picture I ’ve fancy . It all work out , or at least it did for me . "
— Anonymous , 39 , Michigan
7.“He lied about absolutely everything, and his family backed him up until after I filed for divorce, and he was in jail. The amount of lies he told are so long I could write a book; some of the ones that stand out the most are lying about where he got his tattoos done, lying about being in prison (no, he never went), lying about how many kids he had (he said he had four when he only had two), lied about where he was born, lied about where he was raised.”
" And these are n’t even the tip of the iceberg lettuce on his Trygve Lie . Thank good I ’m out of that marriage . "
— Anonymous , 25 , Florida
8.“We got married because we dated in high school. We loved each other, but I got scared because it felt like a business relationship. I wanted more. I left her, lived a lifetime, and 30 years later, I met the woman I would spend the rest of my life with. I have some regrets, but I never go backward.”
" I have been through all the ups and downs , but I ’m in a effective place at this compass point in my lifespan . "
— witchylight303
9.“He didn’t know how to use a microwave and called me ‘fat’ for knowing how to. You can tell it didn’t last long.”
— Anonymous , Indiana
10.“We both were coming out of marriages and did not want to be alone. Being emotional idiots and only seeing what we wanted to in each other, we married less than a year after our divorces were final. It was a nightmare, think Lifetime Movie. Lessons learned: 1) Always give yourself time to heal when a relationship ends, and 2) It’s better to be on your own than with the wrong person.”
" I have been single for about 15 years and have never had more pacification — just me and my cat endure a dramatic event - detached life ! "
— Anonymous , 51 , Massachusetts
11.“I ignored the red flags while dating, had concerns right before the wedding that I chalked up to cold feet, and married anyway. By month eight or nine, I realized he was not a good human at all. He treated waitstaff poorly and played mind games with his ex when it came to raising their daughter. I suddenly realized I had an exit via divorce (I know, duh), and didn’t look back. I have no regrets and am thankful I didn’t waste more of my life being married to him. Got out at age 30 back in 2003 and enjoyed life without him.”
— Anonymous , 52 , Florida
12.“I’d been married once before, and so had she — I was told. I later found out she’d had another husband, but hadn’t changed her name while married to him to keep the same last name as her children with her first husband. Even that wasn’t a total deal breaker. But then I found out about her credit. ‘Her’ house, where she lived, was actually her parents’, and she hoped to shack up with someone willing when arguing with said parents. (That ended up being me.) She couldn’t even get a store card without me co-signing. Every time I co-signed for one, there were another two she put my name on for her to run up. (In the divorce, I was able to have those debts assigned back to her, but GOOD LUCK EXPLAINING THAT TO THE CREDIT AGENCIES!)”
" Finally , she stalk me at body of work . I worked in law enforcement at the time , andshe would listen to a scanner app to hear my call number and locating if I was dispatched or called out something on the radio receiver . Y’all , my ex - married woman would show up at my traffic stops . Because I was look for date ? Rot in hell . ( FWIW : I never regard chisel while we were married . ) "
— Anonymous , 47 , Florida
13.“He told me on our honeymoon night that this marriage was a mistake.”
— happycookie321
14.“My ex-husband and I were together for 10 years total; we married for less than a year within those 10 years. I just simply didn’t want to marry him, but I felt too much guilt to back out because of all the time and effort my friends and family had made. I loved him, but I wasn’t in love anymore. My parents had given us some money toward the wedding, and I knew it was a lot for them, as we weren’t super well off. Meanwhile, my ex’s family paid for an open bar (literally came to, like, $8,000, and I had maybe two drinks). I was willing to make it work, but the night of our wedding, he opted to spend the night with his groomsmen, staying up late and doing coke, while I lay alone in my room. I knew it was over.”
" I tried to make it mold for a couple of month after , but the wounds just guide too deep . This happened when I was 26 , and I ’m 32 now . permit me differentiate you — I ’m thankful it happened because it made me into someone who does n’t do things they do n’t want to do just to please others . It ’s so freeing . "
— Anonymous , 32 , Vermont
15.“We met after I had dated several people. He told me he was most likely my last chance at marriage, so I decided to get married. He accused me of sleeping around. He never let me see our finances. He would take my paycheck, and I would only be allowed to spend whatever I needed for groceries and gas. After a little over a year, I realized this wasn’t love, this was control, and I didn’t have a say in my life anymore.”
" I bequeath . He seek to get me back , but I was n’t having it . I meet the love of my life a few years by and by and have been happily wed for 22 year now . "
— Anonymous , 46 , Florida
16.“I was 23. Two months before my wedding, my mother knew it was a mistake. She tried so hard to gently tell me that it was OK not to go through with it and that all we would lose was some monetary deposits that didn’t matter. But I was stubborn and thought it was ‘what I was supposed to do,’ even if it never felt quite right with him. Culturally and regionally, that’s what everyone in this area did — got married and stayed. Cut to my wedding day, and they opened the doors to the church, and I saw my soon-to-be husband at the end of the aisle and the first thought in my head was, ‘Sh*t….I’m totally getting a divorce.’ Four months in, and he had changed completely; six months in, and we were no longer living together.”
" wrench out he was gay , which honestly would n’t have bother me if he ’d just enjoin me alternatively of using me and then treating me like absolute trash the minute we ’d gotten married . By what would have been our first anniversary , I had leave alone the state . I spent the next 12 years act around the country and get a liveliness I never imagined I could have — all while knowing I ’d never get married again . I ’m 42 now and just celebrated my 8th wedding anniversary and my daughter ’s seventh natal day . At the fourth dimension it blow , and a lot of people were make off one way or another , but if that had never befall I would have never had the courage to bequeath this little town and retrieve all the adventure I did . "
— Anonymous , 41 , Ohio
And finally…
17.“We had been arguing for months about everything and anything: the way we chewed food, what shows we watched, etc. Looking back, neither of us was emotionally ready for that type of commitment. Every conversation ended in tears and a screaming match. We got married in May, thinking it would fix both of our wandering eyes, but it didn’t help. I even cried during the wedding and hesitated to sign the license. Fast-forward a few months, and she tells me that she wants a separation because she needs time to think about how she feels about me.”
" Then , I get a call on Thanksgiving telling me she ’d been seeing someone for a few calendar month and desire a divorcement . I found out she was four months pregnant when we were signing the divorce paper in January , so she ’d been cheating on me even before the wedding party . We were together for five years and married for six months . Now , we ’ve blocked each other and have n’t speak since we sign the divorcement paper . "
— Anonymous , 29 , California
take down : Some responses have been blue-pencil for distance and/or uncloudedness .
